美麗人生紀事簿

Since school started few weeks ago, I have being busy and preoccupied with it, and also with my new helper, Mar. I'm very grateful Mar came down from Seattle to help me out. Like Mar stated, she is my second brain.

The drama at home didn't stop with Mar being here to help. But it seem to have subdue a bit. My mom still on occasions wants to kick me and Mar out of the house. I told my mom, whether she like it or not, I'm here to stay for another 2 years, and Mar isn't going anywhere either. Mar is here to help her. She will accepted our help whether she like it or not.

I'm getting a bit distracted when I read through the conservatorship paperwork. One thing I think that is making my distraction is that meaning that I am bond to my mother's side forever? Or was it just a notion I have. Nevertheless, it something I scare of, maybe it is the best way for it.

Well yesterday I lost my court battle, even though I have hard evidence and witness to the case, the judge ruled to the x-landlord's favor. Unbelievable and disbelieved by the judicial system that I'm living under. The Judge literary spell out that It is okay for trespassing to occurs in San Diego. WOW. I now believed Justiced here is only for the Caucasians. No wonder in the court, being I was the last 2nd person to be heard in court. Those who went before me, all loss. There was an Asian girl tried her case, and the judge ruled that yes the old carpet in her home is substainable, and the realtor (Caucasian) wasn't wrong. It was clearly wrong how the judge ruling went. 10 years the realtor never replaced the carpet. I can see why, because with the judge like this one, why replaced it. Consumer right in California just like dies. Where is the justice in that. Please.

anyways,

I was chatting with someone regarding my mom situation. Yeah yeah, I guess its always best to go with a professional. You know for sure they are getting PAID to listen to your voice. Instead those just hides...but hey nothing news there.

As I think back to the conversation, of how they are so sure someone really cares for you.

I was now thinking, Yes there is. Myself. I care for myself enough to know, when there isn't anyone left for me. Everyone is busy with their life blah blah blah. But I'm not I will take a day off my schedule and take care of myself and assessed the situation at hand. hahahahha

What can I say, I'm a Cancerian. It seem that for people who are born within this sign. We are taking a slightly harder time to get over some major depression. Or maybe its just a Mid-life crisis. Who the hell knows. But I think I'm at the end of my misery. The surrounding is making me to be stronger. And knowing that I only have myself to look forward to. Things seem to be more clearer then before. Or sometime too clear.

Anyways, I think I'm finally over it. I haven't take any medication. Then again, I don't think I'll ever subject myself to that sort of pain.

anyways this afternoon I have ended my one year long depression. I think I'm fully out of it. Because now, I can think clearly. despite what I'm up against. I know the road will get harder, but with faith, I know I will overcomes them. Keeping faith to myself.

These lesson are learn by your experiences in life, very valuable lessons. I know we all dealt things differently. I'm glad I get to experiences them, that way I can re-evaluated my life, on where I want to go.

If the office panel out in Mission Valley. Then I will carry out my business with it up-most attentions. I have plans for myself, and the life-span of it. I want to see it through. I need to get organized, focus, and determined.

I think everything will work itself out. Did I mentioned that I'm getting a corner office. With a LARGE WINDOW.
no more depressing people to drag me down.

Things will go well. I will restart up my classes. Things i Need to do.

I'm determined to see it through.

hahahahaha

And I'm happy I have ended my own misery, or self pity, whatever it was. It is now over.
Because in the next few months and years, will be all on me to pushed myself to see how far I can go!!

I will of course updates my journal.

Moves on! And ROCK HARD!!
cux Jane is starting up and stiring!!! heheheheh

Well I have finally get around and find myself a new office to work in.
And it look nice. Security might be a little issue. But most importantly it has a wall to wall window.
Wow I never imagine I will have a window to work out of. Its a very peaceful atmosphere. I know I'm feel a bit gitters, I felt like I were back in Jan 2009. When I start to launch out my first step again.

I'm feeling it again. I'm excited, and also a bit scare.

But my guts feeling is saying everything will be alright. I'm sure there are more new things awaiting me to conquers and moves in a good direction. I feel everything will be good.

thanks for all support me this far.
hAs this year fly by just a little too fast for me...lol

But i do feel everything is starting to form up nicely

Im getting nervous as well..hahahaha..oh well.

I think my addiction to that tagged place is finally wear off. Seriously, I don't feel the need to get there, but then again all the business have done so far, has literary pushed me away from that social nutcase network hahahaha

I think i have returned myself to my old self.

I guess I was there to either help out some individual or something. but that time is about to passed, and moved on to the bigger pix. I feel I have no more lingering thought of prolong myself to that site any longer, I think my addiction to that site is finally lifted.

I have learn. and time to moved on.

There is definately some really sick individuals linger online. Every single person I meet there, seem to be on some sort of medication. Oh MY!! I think I'm the only sane one there!! Well atleast the only healthy person there. I'm not on any medication nor am I there for anything other then boredom...hahahahaa

Seriously, better let myself go of that hell. It was fun but time to leave! And get real with reality, mine reality!! hahahahaha

Seriously working 15hr shift become like a day in the park. You constantly feel like your day is too short, and you wish that you day can drag out long and longer, so you can cramped in all the things you want to do that day. But a day only have 24 hours. I think each day I only have maybe 4 hours of sleep. LOL

And that is considered lucky! Like today, or should I say yesterday? hahahaha

Anyways, I was at the office around 8am, I didnt leave my office till Midnite! I had to stay there that late, because I'm trying to catch up on my homework for one of my classes. And there is my other class. where I'm completely missing entirely! I know I need to read the chapters for my other classes. I just don't have the time to do them. Shit!!!! I need to find time to study as well.

I figure the time I can do some study is probably the safest bet, it would be after 10pm. That is usually when I'm done with my work. I have breathing room to study, or do my business chores. hahhaha
I usually used that time to chitchat hahaha...but now I need to use my time more effectively.

I think I'm going to used that time to study, instead of try to cramped in all my things last min. Its not healthy and sleep deprivation too!!! hehehehe

Seriously, I think my business is making a new turns. I'm learning so much about business protocols, and labor protocols. It seem I might be ventured into that field soon. LIke really soon! Hmm...Now I need to buy some books for that as well. I think the next hours I will spent it by researching it.

hahahhaa

and there is like 5 things I should of done today, completely escape my mind!!! hahahahaha

hehehee...
I just want to do everything all at once, am I greedy!

I'm looking at getting myself certified as a bookkeeper, Quickbook (maybe Payroll)? to gain more $$ and clientles!

1. Quick book, bookkeeper certified. - Do this ASAP with the study guide. Probably by June 30th, to be certified for bookkeeper.
2. Get CPA certified. - Hopefully by December 2009 or June 2010.
3. Microsoft Word Certified. - Probably August 31, 2009
4. Microsoft certified. - Probably October 2009
5. Finished MSMIS degree (hopefully sometime soon) hahaha - ?? PRobably need to start up the program in SDSU. Who knows.
6. Get Travel Agent Certified. (need to call school again) - ?? those education pplx!
7. Get notarized republic certified. - Doing this on May 9, 2009. Need to call to registered and take examination.

So am I greedy? hahahahaha
I hope not!

Do I even have the time to do all this stuff?
I hope so!

I have to really schedule myself very rigidly and fixed to the study schedule, If I want to get these done within 2 -3 year time frame. hahahahhaa

Wish me luck! hahahahahha

Oh brother!!!

It seem I have landed myself a huge account once again. Well not really huge, but the benefits of it seem to folds to new heights...at least will give me enough exposures as it is. LOL

Oh brother, I really really thought I was going to take it all really really slow, but it seem my timing is just perfect for all this, which is great! Wow...try to breathe!! hahahhahaa

Sometime it is the timing of it all... My goodness! hahahahaa

I do thank Buddha to give me this opportunity!
One thing for sure, I won't have any rest yet!!! hahahahaa
not for a year later!! I can foresee that now...no resttttttttttttt!!!

Well this morning arriving at partner's place. And I didn't realized its Obama's Inaguration day. So I sit there watching the Inaguration. It was a nice one. Actually, this is the first one I have actually watched. B4 I never seem to care or the moment weren't really there. But today was it!

Anyways, after that, we sit around and have some breakfast, and installed more tax software to my Dell PC, and try to contact IRS for the forgotten EIN, since my mac is on repair at the apple store.

Finally got that done, and get the new info. We still aren't able to setup the main info. Still some is missing. But overall the software is running and really go accept new clients. Now we are just sitting back and see if some people is coming in and let us do their returns.

My partners is focus on markteting, and I'm focus on writing articles for our business. Which we wish can hope to find enough clients to go through and sign up for the newsletter.

Then I got a call from NC1 from the navy recruiter. For the time being I just want to get some income, pretty good if all goes through, and then. We sit around and sign up for more networking meeting. I handed that off to my partner. It's her cup of tea.

Then we part around lunchtime, I swing by the office. Where I can get online and uploads all the articles that Mar has proof read for. And add some more things to what is needed for the website.

Hopefully work out all the clink of it. and I did some marketing as well. I gone on Tagged and tell pplx to check out the website and wants to get some insight.

Then 4 pm swing around, waiting for the security folks to do their question for me to get into the reservist duty.

Having a good feeling about this business, and my life I suppose. I have to keep on guard with what I wanted to do.

Around Lunchtime when I got out and walk down to Henry's I noticed some beautiful pictureque places. I then say to myself I need to get my camera and take a pix of this place. Its beautiful.

I'm glad I'm now busy with work, and not spending time online chatting, after all it is a waste of my time.

Only those who you keep close to you are the most important in your life. Rather those who aren't close to you at all.

Which is good.

I love it when I get busy! hehehehe

Oh i finished my day with watch a comedy movie online for free...ehhehe
American Pie 3: wedding!!! !hahahhahaha its sooo funny!!!

Well
I just got my fill of experience working with civilians.....

It is not pretty!
OMG!! I'm about to scream!!! Somehow my thought process and theirs aren't in the same mental state!!! hahahahhahaa

Anyways, today I went downtown to get some answer regarding a permit for a booth at the DMV corner. The civilian that I was talking to was acting ignorance that I'm asking something stupid or something. Well excuse me. If I know what I was asking, I won't be sitting there dumbfounded. Anyways, I have find out that there is no such thing you can do at the city level rather on the private property level....great!

Another round-a-round. Fear not, I will get this straighten out with the DMV department. But this time I will do some research before I go to the property manager of DMV again. With headless like this time. Thanks to the downtown permit department I know what I need to do b4 engaged with the bureaucity of US government again...hahahahaha...

And the other thing is I'm trying to get myself back into active reserve, so I can get some extra money and some extra saving when I go shopping for things.

The 3rd thing I have learns today is never reinvent the wheel, because the civilians mind have no capability adapting to changes. Or its too much for them to handle!

I think it would be easier to just use the service provided at my office then to get an additional internet service. It will be due for about 5 mo out of the year. Which is great. I can deal with that.

Let's see how my partner take on that.
And there is a restructure of our business as well. Oh well. That mean I can get rid of the incompetent IT date I have hanging onto me. hehehehee
time to chop him lose!!! hahahahahahhaa

Oh I still got many updates I need to do on the website.
Mar, I hope you have checking on your email! hehehehe

4th thing, the programs of the business. Taking what 4 weeks to get it on!!! I mean this is civilian time frame. they got no concept on what is "time Is MONEY!"!!!!

anyways....im just blowing steams!!!

Well Im traveling to NYC on New Year Eve on the amtrak train. and from the way the train is moving it seeeeem to be flying.....

And my day turned out swelllll.
I didn't sleep a wink cux around I spot a layer of snow outside of my hotel room window. I left the hotel at 7am, and filled up with all the complimental breakfast they have, with banana and apples for my train rides. And the hike up to from the hotel to the train track was alright it wasn't that bad. My shoe hold up well with the snow. I wish I have gotten myself a scarf, but oh well.

Then I waited at the lounge commuter to wait for the train lounge station to open up so I can exchange my train ticket for my train rides to NYC.

While waiting I strike up a chat with a older woman name Christina (i think) we were talking about our travel experiences and place we gone to, and then I told her about military background and her dad was a veteran army person from the WWII, then we talks about the politics of the US, and then the history of segregation in the states and stuffs. Then she left and went on her train ride, I strike up another conversation a mother of 5 children, her other older children are driving out to Niagara Fall to meet up with them. While she and her hubby take the train with two younger one to see the sight to the fall.

It was a magnificent sight. and took couple pix. Wait till I posted them lol

Then the train got across the US border without incident, but once it gotten on the US custom...hahahaha

2 passenger got tossed off ....for some reason which I didn't ask hahahaha...
then reaching Rochester, NY the train was packed!!!!!
I got a passenger by me. I didn't say much to him in the beginning, other then turned on my music and slept for an hour, till I woke up so i start up a chatting with this guy.
His name is Angel and with Hispanic background, because I told him that I haven't heard about a guy's name "Angel" He corrected me saying that its common name in Hispanic culture. And that name was taken from his grandpa. Cool I guess. then I decided to show him my pix that I have taken up since coming through the US border. About me being trigger happy hahahhaa....

then one lead to the other, I show him my photo collection that I have taken this year. From my cross country road trip and onward to Taiwan... hahahhaa
It was cool ...Because its almost like re-lived thorough my travels again hahahaha

I guess the other New Yorker around us was trying to catch my eyes. I ignored them. hahahaha. Snotty ass. hahahaha

anyways, by the time, Angel got off his stop, he seem to be impressed by my travel and background knowledge of places I have gone to. And I heard some one was telling someone about their education background...hahahaha

whatever, education still got nothing to come close to what I have learned through my experiences.
hahahah
I think the kid think im really old!!! hahahaha

Then we find out the train was giving away free sandwiches...heeheh we drump up immediate for that ...hahahhahaa...
and now im sitting here relaxing with occasion thump by the backseat kid...

But overall the travel has being pleasant.

Sometime ago, on various occasions I was approached by individuals on what is it I seek online. I told them I'm only interested in friendship. Some even laughed and say there is no such thing. But I have found wonderful friends online. Some I know for over 8 years and some I know for few years. But regardless their fast becoming my friends.

This is my definition of what is a true friend means to me. A true friends will recognized you for who you are and what you are. Not from what you wear, what you have, and what you gain. Just being the real you.

Today was a very special day for me. I gotten online early today and a old online friend of mine came online.

Which I haven't chatted with for almost 2 years. But I spotted him online and shout him and Hello. and We catch up like old time sake. here there and where hahaha. Although there being the time period of absent but somehow when you are with friends it quickly disperse.

Its almost like rekindle a old friendship. The wonders of Internet, people I would never ever come across, now they are in my friend list onilne. People I never would meet without Internet will now become my best of friends.

So those who don't believed in true friendship, then you probably haven't meet some real friends in your life. I'm quite fortunates to come across couple true friends through internet, and fortunate enough to meet them face to face offline or online.

Anyways just want to take this time to say.
Merry Xmas and Happy New years to all my True Friends!
That held true to my heart!
Have a wonderful new year in coming!

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

You used to captivate me
By your resonating life
Now I'm bound by the life you've left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me